If you’ve broken up with your significant other recently, then you probably fall into one of two categories. Either you are ready to move on and put everything about your ex in the past, or you are having second thoughts and are now trying to think of ways of getting back together with your ex. It’s not easy to break yourself away from something that seemed so right for a time, so maybe you were wrong about breaking up. Think the whole thing through before you decide to revisit the past and try to make things right. A future without your lost love is really a blank slate where anything is possible.
But if you want to win back your lost love then you are already going over partially traveled ground. This may be why you want your lost love back, because you are afraid of an uncertain future, whereas you find comfort in the familiar surroundings you once had. But things can’t really be exactly the same for you to win your ex back. Something went wrong to make you break up in the first place, so you will have to be honest with yourself in evaluating what went wrong. Maybe most of the blame falls on one person and it is up to that person to apologize. If that person is you, then you will have to convince your ex that you really mean it, especially if you said it before and the other person didn’t accept it. You will have to back your words up with actions that say “I’m sorry”.
If the shoe is on the other foot and it is your ex who must apologize, then be gracious and forgive them. That doesn’t make you a victim who is setting himself up for another fall. It makes you a better person. Your ex will also have to prove to you that mistakes of the past won’t be repeated. Forgiving doesn’t mean your ex now has carte blanche and a “get out of jail free card” to wipe the slate clean if mistakes happen in the future. If the concept of forgiveness has been alien to your upbringing, then you might want to read a book that explains the benefits of this virtue that is older than the bible.
No relationship is on a perfect path to happiness, and forgiveness is central to successfully solving any problems that come up along the way. You will find many uses for this concept in the future if you do succeed in winning back your lost love. Old hurts have a way of resurfacing when tensions are mounting. Memories for bad events can last a lifetime. But forgiveness once given is meant to be forever. You can’t take it back.
After forgiveness, you must show your lost love that you really are the person that they fell in love with once before. The mistake wasn’t a representation of the real you. You make mistakes because you are not perfect, but you learn from your mistakes, and that is something that your ex will appreciate about you.
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