Some time has passed since you broke up with your girl and now you are having second thoughts and wondering how you might go about getting your girlfriend back. At least that’s the way you see things, but you don’t know if she has reached the same conclusions that you have.
What you do know is that the breakup happened, and feelings were hurt, so be very careful about how you proceed. The last thing you want to do is to make the situation worse. The first steps that you take must be tentative and here are some considerations to guide your actions.
- Was it something you did that caused the breakup? If you cheated on her the answer is obvious but things aren’t always that simple. If you can identify something you did that precipitated the breakup then ask yourself if it is something you can fix. Can you keep it from happening again? Or is it something that she will simply have to forgive you for.
- If it really was your fault, you will have to let her know that you are aware of your mistake and that you are sincerely sorry. Nobody is perfect and sometimes an apology is all you can offer. If she can accept your apology then have passed the first hurdle. She will see forgiveness as a virtue in herself and humility as a virtue in you.
- Keep up your other relationships, even to the extent of seeing other girls. That is what a healthy person would do, and you don’t want her to think that you are anything other than a healthy person. You can continue with the same circle of friends that the both of you shared before. It could even introduce pangs of jealousy into the equation that might work to your benefit.
- Your ex should see that life is continuing normally for you, but let her know that you never stopped caring about her. It’s not time to send her a Valentine’s Day card, but a birthday card or Christmas card would certainly be appropriate for someone you care about. This will let her see the nurturing side of you without the haze of romance, and she will find you more desirable than ever.
- Your friends are important to you, so be friends with your ex. You can never have enough friends, and sometimes best friends turn into soulmates.
With a friendship established, you should be able to bring up the subject of the breakup, and ask her why she thinks you broke up. Just ask her for her opinion, without any pressure. She may have been thinking all the things you have been thinking, or she may surprise you. Whatever she says, accept it as her honest point of view and move on from there.
Leave a Reply